When one of my daughters was about 2, I was pregnant and we decided to go to Chuck E Cheese for her birthday. The waitress brings out a disgusting looking concoction that my daughter decided she wanted to eat. And to my embarrassment, she yells at the top of her lungs, "Mommy, it looks like what you puked up this morning!"

Yesterday while in our pool, my 5yo daughter says, "Mommy, is pee-pee water?" I told her, "Ummm baby, pee-pee is water in a way. It depends on how you look at it. Why?" To which she replies, "Cuz I just went pee-pee in the pool."

I was at the superstore shopping with my daughter. They were giving out maxi pad samples. Brooklyn asked me what they were for. Keeping things simple, I said that they protect panties from getting wet. She turned around and asked the girl for another one and said, "My daddy and I will have to share this because we both drip pee in our underwear."

Someone I work with told me this story...A mom was driving down the road with her 4 year old twin daughters and one of their friends from daycare. Unable to avoid it, mom hit a duck. She thought the three girls would be sad but instead, the friend replies with the cutest lisp, "Mrs. Moxim, you scared the feathers right off that duck!"

My 3 year old niece is in the bathroom and I'm at the computer. All of a sudden, she wants me to go to the bathroom and wipe her. I told her she knows how to wipe herself, and she says, "No way." When I asked why, she said: "It's too stinky!"

"Mama, I'd like to have a hug for dessert." Quote after dinner from my 7yo (she asked for thirds! :)

My 22 month-old daughter is your typical egocentric toddler, speaking in sentence fragments peppered with lots of "Me, Mine, My" words. The other day she sneezed and promptly said, "Bless you, me".

I listened in as my 5 year old son and his best friend discussed plans to build their dream car when they grow up. They discussed in detail about how their car would be a race car with flames shooting out, etc. Then the friend added, "And we should get a regular car too, you know, so we can do errands and stuff."

I overheard some neighborhood kids playing hide-n-seek. First kid: "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10. . . Ready or not, here I come!" Second Kid: "I'm not ready!" Kid #1: [counts again] "Ready or not, here I come." Kid #2: "I'm not ready!" Kid #1: [counts for a third time] "Ready or not here I come!" Kid #2: "I'm not ready!" Kid #1: "Well, that's it! I'm coming anyway!"

Out with my son, a lady asks how old he is. I say he is 3 and my son says, "Tell her I'm almost 4." He is actually 3-and-a-half.